Let's be honest, like most people, I HATE waiting. I want things to happen as I see fit...That's out of my fleshly arrogant selfish ambition though...
Reality is that well...Sometimes God does show us things and He'll tell us some things too but we can't do anything about it. It's crazy. He took me through this humbling process and that's when He reiterated something He told me a while ago. Only this time, I'm not the same Alana that existed a couple months ago or even last year. I am now willing to follow God's voice and yield to my Father more than I am willing to satisfy my fleshly desires. Waiting. It's the HARDEST thing I've yet to do. I was talking to God the other day explaining that "Lord, I don't see any signs or evidence of the very thing you showed me and affirmed to me. I know I hear your voice, I know I'm not crazy and I definitely know you're not a liar." & Almost immediately as I'm laying out my heart to Him, Holy Spirit made it quite evident that He's doing things in His Perfect timing. If I were to see ANY signs of what He showed me right now I would immediately grab hold of it and start trying to take control. When He has this beautiful strategy that He is working on and if I misstep or go out of His order then it could very well be detrimental. Not that He isn't able to fix the things we mess up but sometimes we make things take longer than we have to when we try to walk according to our own desires and will instead of following God's master plan. He's an amazing strategist. He's shown me that before, so I have no choice but to trust in not only what He showed me but trust Him when He says WAIT and BE QUIET! LOL smh Two of the MOST difficult things for Alana...Everyone who really knows me knows that. Be Quiet? What? I didn't even know that existed until God led me to do it recently. Long sigh. Jesus. I want to talk about it with any and everyone but Wisdom, discernment and He says No...not yet. So I wait. I wait not only for what He showed me to come to pass but I wait until He releases me to even speak on it with anyone. I wait. Jesus, It's difficult as HECK but I saw first hand where following my own desires led me and I don't want to end up back in that place again. I'll trust His plan, let go of mine and realize that even though I don't see ANY evidence of this thing happening anytime soon, God has never been and never will be a liar. Shalom.
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October 2017
1 Cor. 13:13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is Love. Categories |